Winter Robins Seriously Rethink Stay-Put Strategy

Admit that migrating robins are probably on "survival-friendly" track.

Robin (4254694289)
via Wikimedia Commons

OME SO-CALLED winter robins, the orange-breasted thrushes who stay put in winter states even when the snow and cold set in, are rethinking their non-migration strategy during this record-breaking 2010-2011 season.

Said Phyllis the robin, "I'm not much for long-distance flying, but right now in Florida it's 80 degrees, whereas last night my feet almost froze to the power line. It makes me ask myself, 'Phyllis, why are you here in Minnesota?' And I don't have an answer to that question, to be perfectly honest."

George the robin, who spent most of the day looking for a heated bird bath, is also reviewing his anti-migration policy.

"There's no doubt that this winter the migrating robins are on a survival-friendly track," admitted George. "Jack over there is dead as a doorknob. Fell right out of the tree, frozen like a robinsicle, poor bastard. Winter isn't for everyone, I can tell you."

Phyllis says that she and her friend Marcie the robin will be organizing an informal get-together in a few days to "bird-brainstorm some ideas for next season, like whether we want to fly to Florida or Texas. I don't see why we can't at least leave the door open. It's not like we don't know how to get there, and we can take lots of rest stops along the way, see the countryside, eat some worms and whatnot."

George said he'd attend the meeting "if I live to see it. I heard some human say it was going to get down to 5 below tonight, and I was like 'no way.' But what can you do but fluff up and hope for the best."

"I think warm thoughts," said Phyllis. "Sunshine, juicy flies. But still, I think Florida is not a bad idea right about now."

"Or Texas," said Marcie.