"We were just discussing the beauty of nature," insists Governor Stud.
MBATTLED South Carolina Governor Mark Sanford, still reeling from the public airing of his lengthy imbroglio with a spicy Argentine lover, hit the Appalachian Trail over the weekend, but not alone. Entertainment Tonight's heli-scoop-ter spotted His Honor pitching tents with none other than toned and tanned actress Jennifer Aniston.
Lots of juicy copter shots captured the secretive hikers scurrying to separate cover. Jen's fabulous Armani gold-toned canvas accommodationscomplete with satin flooring, stainless-steel cookware and sterno in this fall's fashion palette of maroon, dark chocolate, and ash greyput the Gov's plain-Jane pup tent to shame.
ET's own Mary Hart shimmied down her 'scoopter rope to grab the interview exclusive of the year on the quaint and woodsy Appalachian Trail, known to Americans as "that place where really poor people live."
Despite her three-inch heels, Mary Hart outran the Governor as he attempted to hide inside a large, badly manicured dogwood bush. Mary's cameraman was not far behind as she asked the Governor why he was sneaking around the Appalachian Trail with the sleek and sexy Jennifer Aniston.
"I am not sneaking around, Mary. WE are not sneaking around. Can't a man have a quiet retreat in one of our nation's most beautiful natural settings to clear his head? Can't Ms. Aniston also happen to be clearing her head at the same time and meet up with me completely by coincidence on a 2100-mile trail? What?"
"Governor, how does Miss Argentine Lover feel about sharing you with Jennifer Aniston, who, if I may just say, looks fabulous! I hate you!! You look like a 25-year-old girl!!"
"Why thank you, Mary," beamed a sun-kissed Jen.
Said the Governor as he rushed to tear down his canvas fashion disaster, "'Miss Argentine' is not my lover. She's just a girl who thinks that I am the one. But I'm not. I've got a wife. Now if you'll please leave me alone."
Mary Hart said the two lovebirds left by separate limo, "but looked back fondly at each other, with a glance that spoke volumes."
"Speaking of volume," added Ms. Hart, "did you see Jen's fabulous hair? I hate her!"
© 7.1.09 Kate Heidel